Thoughts of a Messiah
by Shizuka no Taisho
Summary: ...hold it together, birds of a feather. Nothing but lies and crooked wings…    He knew what he wanted now, after years of debating and comforting himself with the lies that humanity pressed upon him. It was time to fly...  DFxVM! Don't like? No read!


_**Sorry AUB readers, but the next chapter is slow in coming (sighs). Too much to do, and I've been in a ranging mood lately when it comes to my writing. Do forgive me. But since it is my dear friend Candlelight-chan/World at Peace's birthday, I wanted to give her a gift I knew she would enjoy: a fresh dose of DannyxVlad!**_

_**Love you darling! Thanks for always being a great fan and friend! **_

**Disclaimer: Danny Phantom is not mine. It belongs to Butch Hartman and Nickelodeon, the fucktards who took it off the air. **

_Hold it together, birds of a feather. Nothing but lies and crooked wings…_

Danny stiffened in his chair, tears stinging crystal eyes. The pain was nothing, and he repeated that mantra continuously in his head, fighting off the whimpers begging to part his pale lips. 'Nothing, nothing…c'mon Danny, you can handle this, you've done it before…' he pressed his forehead against the smooth leather of the chair, nails marring the black fabric. "Nghh…h-hurts."

Slender fingers cupped his own, squeezing. Danny glanced to the side, and with a tiny nod forced his fist open, entwining his hand with the older male's. Sitting beside him, Vlad smiled weakly, glimmers of discomfort heavy in sapphire blue. "Daniel…..this was your choice."

"..I know," Danny murmured. "I chose this Vlad. M'not blaming you…." sighing, he blew feathery bangs out of his face and brought fingers to his lips for a kiss. Normally he would've done something perverted, like lick them or nibble gently. This wasn't the time. He was in too much pain anyway. He couldn't show Vlad that though; fuck knows he felt bad enough as it was. Sure, this had been all his idea, but Vlad was the one dishing out the money for it. Hnn...maybe this was some sort of sick, twisted, inner penance for them both. Retribution for all the pain. So many things had gone wrong in their relationship, and Danny knew many were his own doing. He was an idiot. Then again, so were most teenagers. Being eighteen really didn't make all that much of a difference in the long run, now that he thought about it.

'Course, being eighteen was the only reason he was getting away with doing this. Vlad certainly wasn't happy about it. But the way Danny figured, this was a great way of showing the older man that he was secure in their relationship. He was tired of running, and fighting. He knew what he wanted now, after years of debating and comforting himself with the lies that humanity pressed upon him.

It was time to fly, and he was ready to stretch out his wings.

"Hey…how's it looking?"

"Daniel, I'm hardly knowledgeable in these matters," Vlad rolled his eyes, but there was a hint of a smile on his lips. "However…if I had to make a judgment." He leaned down, soft lips caressing Danny's forehead. "It looks wonderful."

_I have the answer, spreading the cancer. You are the faith inside me. _

Smiling back, Danny touched his free hand to Vlad's nape and pulled him down, familiar silken tresses rolling across his palm. The buzz at his spine was pushed to the back of his mind as he pecked the older's lips, the taste of coffee brushing his tongue. He could never grow tired of that taste. It was all Vlad, and more importantly….

"Lay back down. You're almost done."

Danny nodded. Slumping in the chair once more, he tapped fingers against the armrest, wincing as a particular patch of vibrations sent powerful shocks soaring down his back. Yeah, this was something he definitely wouldn't be getting used to. Fucking hurt…..but he could think of things that could hurt so much more. The silver haired man sitting beside him, guiding him through this? Losing him would be that so much more. And he nearly had, once upon a time. His stupid pride and childish arrogance had nearly left him alone, forgotten. Friends weren't forever, Danny knew that. Sam and Tucker couldn't always be there fore him, offering the support his…'condition' required. Frankly, their brand of support wasn't really what he needed either. Not completely. Sympathy was great; empathy though….it was necessary, with all of the hate his role gathered. Vlad understood that. They were the same. Ghost DNA was like their own personal cancer, tainting their bodies and morphing them into creations no else could fully understand. No one but each other, that is. Danny sighed, feeling his skin crawl with the tickling sensations.

At sweet sixteen, his back had been made a home to a quote he'd gotten off of Sam. "Doushite….boku wa"

"Kowareta Messiah," Vlad finished, tracing the faded lettering. Danny smiled, closing his eyes. Why am I a broken messiah? The quote sang true. That was a question he'd asked himself countless times in the past, in simpler terms of course. Why did people mistrust him? Why was he offered up as a sacrifice, then disposed of the second things went wrong? It wasn't fair. He was played off as a villain, when all he wanted was to help people. Hell, he'd nearly driven himself insane with the effort to win their trust, and in the process came close to destroying himself. "…Daniel?"

"Yeah?" Cracking open a hazy blue orb, he glanced up at him. "What's up?"

Vlad offered up a loving smile, and Danny blinked in surprise as hair was tucked behind his ear, soft fingertips grazing his cheekbone. "I won't let you be broken anymore."

Danny blushed bright red, giving a tiny grin. "Yeah right. Like I could be." He thumbed the curve of his lover's hand; he'd had it memorized for years, and the pale flesh was as much a comfort now as it had ever been. Vlad was the one who'd pulled him from the depths of despair, given him purpose. Enemies or not, the halfa had understood a cry for help, and so he'd embraced the teenager into his world. Eventually, the walls had fallen. He and Vlad had become…more. They gave each other the faith to survive, prosper.

_No, don't….leave me to die here, help me survive here. Alone, don't remember….remember…_

The buzzing stopped, and Danny wrinkled his nose as a cool brush of a cloth washed over his back. "Stings," he muttered. Vlad shook his head and frowned.

"I expect so. It'll be over soon though." Patting his wrist, he rose to his feet. "I'm going to go hunt down some coffee. Would you care for anything?"

"No!" Danny's hands was grabbing at the sleeve of Vlad's jacket before he even realized what he'd done. The billionaire gawked at him, his body taking on a natural hesitance as he glanced toward the door. Danny flushed, glancing at his fingers; they were all but ripping the thin fabric, he was clutching so hard, and he forced his grip to slacken with a worried laugh. "Sorry…" he folded his arms on the chair's front, avoiding Vlad's gaze. "I just-y'know…."

"Daniel? Do you want me to stay?" Vlad touched his shoulder blade, careful of the smeared flesh. There was a note of tender possession in the way his fingertips traced soothing circles, one no one else would've recognized. He did, and it made him chuckle. "Daniel?"

Danny looked up at him. There was undying sincerity in the older male's gaze. Four years ago, he never would have believed Vlad possible of any sort of affection, much less honesty. Things really had changed. "It's stupid. I-I keep thinking I'll forget you."

"Forget me?"

Forget him, his teachings….everything. Vlad had helped him realize his full potential, in terms of mastering his ghost powers and with dealing with the troubles of everyday life. In a way, it was a screwed up sense of balance. Vlad offered stability, wisdom, and the dangerous edge that his inner self craved, but was too timid to touch. And he, in return, was wild and spontaneous, an eager pupil to Vlad's teachings. He was also a lover.

Oh, sure, Danny had tried dating normal people. Well, if you could call Valerie and Sam _normal_. But it just….didn't work. They never filled the void in his chest that cried out for something more. Vlad was the only person, disregarding gender, that had ever reached out to him and offered a connection. Even back when they were at each other's throats, the offer had been there. Danny had just been blinded by his masks of justice, refusing to see what was staring him in the face. Vlad was the same. Years later, he had finally come to terms with that. They'd had to work past the whole 'villain' issue, but it was all balance. With Danny there, the billionaire's antics ceased, for the most part. He even lent an assisting hand to the younger halfa when needed. He really was a decent guy.

…no, his younger self did not gag in the far reaches of his mind at that. Not at all.

"….yeah…." Danny finally replied. "Forget you. I mean, you've taught me so much Vlad. And when you're here, I know I'll remember. But when you leave…I dunno. Natural reflex kicks in. …you understand?"

Vlad's brow arched, and he calmly tilted Danny's face to the side, making his cheek press to worn leather. Danny yelped, taking care to avoid moving his back, though that proved far more difficult when his lover leaned over and purred lightly in his ear, sifting fingers into feathered black. "If I'm that easy to forget, then perhaps I should spend more time imposing my presence upon you….."

_Put me to sleep evil angel…..open your wings evil angel….._

"Maybe…." he ignored the familiar jolts of arousal churning in his stomach. Like the devil himself, Vlad was more than capable of drawing the most sinful of responses from those around him with the mere quip of his silver tongue. Danny knew that better than anyone. How many times had Vlad convinced him to skip school in order to jet halfway across the world on some romantic getaway? Danny grinned despite himself, earning a delighted expression from the dark eyed male. Then again, those had been some really great experiences. He'd cherish them forever. "I wouldn't mind you imposing your presence more often. You do it so well."

Prick. A harder sting hit his spine, and Vlad laughed at his expression of discomfort. "Daniel, your mouth is going to get us in trouble someday, you know that?"

"Hey, you're the one who mentored ME, V-man. Not my problem. This birdie's gotta soar sometime."

"Yes, well, keep it up and those wings of yours are going to get bent, little badger." He nuzzled Danny's neck, kissing the skin there. "The when and how is all up to you though…"

Danny blushed, shooing him away. "Pervert. Go get your damn coffee."

_I'm a believer, nothing could be worse. All these imaginary friends…._

Vlad smirked at him, patting his head once before wandering away. Watching him go, the brunette let his muscles slacken, not that it did much for the radiant flares itching down his shoulder blades.

"Hngh…" his brow puckered. What _was_ it with him, seriously? His mind was pulling a major self-realization kick today.

…maybe it was the hormones.

Ever since he'd turned sixteen, a switch in his brain seemed to have just…flicked on. It was weird. Like, freaky weird. Much more than ghosts and monster overrunning the town. He was used to all that. This was on a whole new level of weirdness. Especially because…..weeeelllll…he wasn't what could be considered a _deep thinking _kind of kid, and he never had been. Clueless, naïve, dumbfounded. Those all had been titles he'd picked up over the years. Yet the minute he'd ascended into the magical plane of adulthood, everything went insane. He'd started pondering the deep workings of the universe, contemplated how he'd hooked up with his former greatest enemy, all while trying to master a growing spectrum of ghostly abilities AND keeping them hidden from the world.

Smiling wryly, he glanced over his shoulder. Black against white, much like the uniform he wore in ghost form. It'd seemed fitting. Something old, something new. A mark of his change. _Boku Wa Kowareta Messiah _had been a milestone at sixteen, when he'd first started looking at the world around him. Now he was ready to fly, and therefore displayed it proudly. And confused thoughts or not, there had only ever been one person there alongside him each and every step of the way. "Vlad…"

Fact was, he, Sam and Tucker had been growing apart ever since he hit puberty and started becoming more interested in things other than video games. He'd taken an actual liking to school, letting Vlad get him that private tutor he'd been hinting at, and his grades escalated as a response. He'd started dressing nicer, casual dress shirts mixed with jeans, feet in worn leather boots bummed off his dad. Ok, so that last part wasn't really nice, but he liked them. They were comfy.

Danny tapped his foot against the floor, said leather brushing his toes comfortably. That was one thing he'd never quite understood. Sixteen, a change of clothes, and out of nowhere his scruffy hair went from nerdy to sexy. Pale skin, pimple free and smooth as butter, received jealous ogling from his teenage counterparts, while the women literally fawned over his pale eyes. Fawned! Over him! Still did, if he was completely honest with himself. He didn't tell Vlad that however; he was jealous enough as it was. He loved having a sexy lover, that much the older man had made clear. He just didn't like others admiring what was his. "Possessive," Danny grumbled under his breath. Ah well. He liked it. He was just as bad. And since he'd become major eye candy amongst the fakers whose attention he'd once craved, the possessive attitude was all the more appreciated.

He was a teenager. But he wasn't stupid. Danny liked having real friends. Sam and Tucker? They weren't as close, yeah, but they still hung out. There was secret sharing, movie dates, all that fun stuff. All those so called popular kids and admirers? They were overrated.

_Hiding betrayal, driving the nail. Hoping to find a savior….._

Leather, sticky with his sweat, creaked as he and the chair were readjusted to a lower angle, his chin practically parallel with the floor. Danny groaned, feeling the sting begin once more. Jesus Christ, why had he decided to do this again?

'Feh. Sounded like a good idea at the time.'

Then again, he was pretty sure it hadn't been this bad when he was sixteen. Eh, Sam had probably numbed him or something. She was nice like that.

Danny snickered to himself, couldn't help it. Sam, nice. Yeah, that was a load of lols. He fully remembered her look of rage back so long ago, when he told her about Vlad. 'Course, no girl liked to hear that her boyfriend was dumping her for someone twice his age…that was a guy….who just so happened to be the psycho who'd tried to kill her and said boyfriend on a number of occasions. He'd been out of the water and into the frying pan with that one. It'd been all he could do to keep her from running to Vlad's house and pummel his face in.

That really would've sucked too. Vladdie was pretty damn sexy, in an aristocratic sort of way.

Man, he'd been called all sorts of names that day. Danny flinched just thinking about them! Traitor, mutant spawn, scum; those were all the PG insults. Worse, he'd kinda deserved them. He had been cheating on her with an eccentric billionaire, and hiding it from her, Tucker, his whole family….was still kinda doing that last one….

No. No more deliberating on that one. He still got a nauseous feeling whenever he thought about it.

_No, don't…leave me to die here, help me survive here. Alone, don't…surrender….surrender…_

….dammit, too late. He was already thinking about it.

Danny kicked his foot against the floor, since he couldn't really move. So fucking irritating. He had to watch where his mind wandered! Now all he could imagine was his parents learning about Vlad. It wasn't gonna be pretty. V-man, Vladdie; he was his dad's best friend. 'And Mom still hates him…..yeah…..'

"You're thinking awfully hard." A cup of steaming black liquid was thrust in his face. Danny blinked, staring at it for a second, then accepted it with a look of utter adoration. "I take it that the coffee is appreciated," Vlad reclaimed his seat and sipped his own brew; no sugar, a hint of vanilla. The farthest he'd ever gotten on his quest to make the older man branch out and taste something new.

"Definitely." He pried the lid off and nearly purred as the hot liquid trickled down his throat. "Fuck…."

"Language…" Vlad chided. Danny knew it was more for a sake of normalcy than anything else. "Now, is all this thinking merely for the sake of distracting yourself from the pain, or are there genuine thoughts rolling in that pretty head of yours?"

Sometimes he forgot that his boyfriend was a complete jackass. "Haha. You're a comedic genius." Taking another quick gulp of the steaming coffee, he handed the cup back to the elder and tapped fingers down his thigh. "I was just thinking about Mom, and Dad. How they're gonna react." He peered at Vlad from beneath his bangs; the silver haired man was frowning, but not unpleasantly. "Y'know…."

"I do. Trust me, I've had many the same thoughts here recently. But Daniel, you are eighteen now. You made a decision to have a healthy relationship with another adult. That isn't a crime."

"Is when you're dating your former arch nemesis," Danny grinned, flicking his waist. "Or when said adult is over twenty years my senior."

Vlad scoffed, setting down his own cup. "We're both mature, responsible, well raised gentlemen. One more than the other," he laughed at the slap that hit his arm, and took Danny's hand back in his own. The teen blushed a pale red, squeezing his fingers. "If your parents love you, and I know they do, then they will understand. It will just take time."

"Time we've got. I mean, we do know the guy that controls it."

Both males laughed. Danny's eyes brightened slightly, but a frown still tugged at his lips. "…s'not just that though, Vlad. I mean, look at how Sam and Tucker reacted. And they're my best friends. They're supposed to back me up, no matter what stupid shit I get into." He paled. "N-not that you're a mistake or anything! I'm just saying, it's all kind of fucked up. If they reacted so badly, then who knows how Mom and Dad will!"

Fuck, now he was on a tirade.

"Not to mention, there's this whole clinginess thing I've got going. I can't even stand to be away from you Vlad! I get all paranoid and shit. I keep thinking I'm gonna back to the way I was before I turned sixteen-"

"Naïve and ignorant?" Vlad chimed in, earning a dirty look from the brunette.

"You know what I meant Vlad."

Unfortunate, yet true. As sad as it was, he always felt his heart ache whenever Vlad wasn't near him. They were close, and he was tempted to use the dreaded L-word to describe his feelings for the elder. Something always held him back though. He'd never told Vlad, but there were….doubts. Danny scowled at himself, fingering the metal workings of the chair. You didn't spend over two solid years hating a man, then forget all about it. Shacking up with him helped, yeah, but it was the principle of the matter! Somewhere in the back of Danny's mind, he understood that part of him would never fully trust the billionaire. Not for a good while anyway. He just…couldn't….things had gone from bad to good in his life far too quickly after he'd turned sixteen. Hmm. Again, the dreaded hormones. "…..it's…complicated."

"Complicated." Vlad's gaze softened, and he leaned against Danny's chair, staring him down. "Daniel, I don't pretend to understand every little thought that runs through your head. But I do know that trust is earned, and I have to work for it. As do you." A kiss breezed across his lips, making Danny smile. "I'm no Lucifer. I'm not here to lead you into sin, then abandon you in your time of need. You're mine. I won't surrender our future without a fight." Pausing, Vlad pecked the corner of his mouth, his expression devilish. "I do believe this is the point where you make some sort of snide remark regarding my horribly possessive nature, or some other nonsense."

"Shuddup Vlad." Danny turned and melded their lips together. The kiss was warm, sweet, and it made him purr in the back of his throat. He was so lucky….Vlad knew. He knew, and Danny didn't have to explain. They were two halves of a whole. One's thoughts were another's worries. Vlad didn't need to be able to read his mind; he had a front row seat in his own.

Two years, and they were already this close. Presumptuous as it was, Danny wondered what the next two would bring…and the next after that. His grin turned infectious, just as the last prick of needle through skin radiated down his spine. The grin dissolved into a wince, earning a chuckle from his lover. "Don't laugh! It hurts!" He peered over his shoulder, craning to see the handiwork. "Am I done? Not that I don't appreciate your paying for all this, but my back feels like it was hit by a truck."

Vlad looked at the pierced and tattooed artist that had been crouched over Danny's back for well over two hours. The man gave two thumbs up, setting the tattooing gun aside. "You're finished." Taking the teen's hand, he helped him sit up from the chair, muscles rippling under reddened skin and stretching the freshly inked canvas that had become his back. Danny grinned, excited, and turned his back towards the mirror sitting across from him.

To his credit, he didn't jaw drop…much.

Large wings covered the entire span of his back. Graceful, tattooed in varying lines of white and black, they were as intricate and differing as he and Vlad. One feathered, like that of an angel's, and curling gracefully at the tips. The other horned, glistening with inky feathers, and streaked with the silvery white.

"Which is which?" Vlad traced outside the path of a long feather. Danny didn't need an elaboration. He'd chosen these wings specifically, back when he'd first told Vlad what he wanted for his eighteenth birthday. One angel wing, the other of a devil. Good and evil. Black and white. Yin and Yang.

See? Symbolic craziness. His mind really was a thoughtful cesspool these days.

"…." Danny admired the wings for a few more seconds, then turned and stared instead at the handsome man also regarding the new tattoo work. Vlad had been the first to ever see his quote, other than Sam. More importantly, he'd been the first to _understand _it. Why was he was a broken messiah? Because he'd fought to be something he wasn't, and refused to accept that sometimes things weren't always what they seemed. Vlad being a prime example. Danny the next.

He wasn't evil. He wasn't an angel. He was just….both. None. Danny.

"-both."

Vlad smiled, a silver brow arching. "Both?"

Danny nodded, looking determined. "We're both. You're evil, I'm good. I'm evil, you're good. Topsy turvy. Mystical two halves of the same whole, and all that fun stuff." There were no more boundaries. He'd cut them all down. Vlad didn't need the tattoo to prove that. He had his own wings, they were just invisible. And now…now he had a pair of his own. He could fly, truly. It was freedom. He wanted to get closer to his lover, to feel him, know him….love him. "We're both."

"….." looking half ready to protest, dark eyes raked over his ink covered back, until a slow smile formed on pale lips. Danny could all but see the gears winding in that head. Odd as it was, he suspected Vlad was thinking the same as he. "How very eloquent." Strong arms wrapped around Danny's shoulders, and Vlad rested his chin on a bony shoulder. "They suits you."

"No. They suits us," Danny frowned.

Cocking his head, there was a tentative pause before Vlad dragged his fingertip down a slightly bleeding wing. "You know what Daniel? …..I think they do."

Danny closed his eyes and released a soft breath, leaning into the chair. All of his worries seemed to vanish without a trace, fading with each fresh sting of the fresh tattoo. Already he felt lighter.

_Fly over me, evil angel. Why can't I breathe, evil angel…..?_

There was the catch. Now he could.

_**Apologizing horribly if this sucked ^^; I was on a deadline, as I was desperate to get this done for Candle-chan's birthday. Plus, I'm kinda out of sync when it comes to DFxVM. If this was confusing in any way, then I apologize. Blame my insomnia, impatience, and current obsession with the song Evil Angel. Which is where the italicized lyrics in this come from, btw. Excellent song. Listen to it ;) **_

_**Hope you enjoyed! (especially you birthday girl!)**_

_**~Shizuka **_


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